Sunday, July 22, 2007
today... went out with her again...
and she brought a friend and her 'korkor' with her and her didi.
then went to buy tickets.
erm, let me think...
the show is invisible target.
then we go buy the tickets.
then go to arcade there.
all were playing
but i really no mood in playing =(
dunno why lah.
keep feeling sad.
the whole freaking day sia.
haiz.
then go arcade..
sl was playing that dunno machine.
that u get the hook to make the bear bear out.
1 game is 2 dollars sia.
dunno how many he play.
i was thinking how many people actually won that lo
2 dollars 1 plate of chicken rice.
then if he play 10 plate
20 dollars!
omg, can get a converse bear sia.
even nicer =x
hahas.
then her friend was playing the drumming thing...
quite good bah.
i dun play arcade much. thats why i dun really know.
but see her always get combo.
should be very very good bah.
then when go in...
just as i thought.
i really saw carol.
she is still so pretty -.-
her eye is always that nice sia.
big big eye with long long eye lash.
not i like her.
dun misunderstand.
but i really like her eye alot. -.-
imagine if my girlfriend got such a long eye lash.
and big eye. stare at it so attractive lo.
aiya
but i really no feeling for her...
then went to say hi to her..
then go back to arcade -.-
then saw a few guys playing the bball machine.
very funny sia
all anyhow throw.
then not much scores lo...
haiz.
then we went to kfc to eat.
i really dunno how to talk to her.
really dunwan to irritate her.
and dunwan to make myself think so much.
so i brought my psp along to play and divert my attention from thinking those sad stuff.
lucky she brought her friends along to keep her accompany.
if not she alone will make her feel so upset more.
then we watched movie, she sat with her friends in front while me, des, sl and didi sit together due to seat spliting.
haiz.
totally sad sia.
i seriously also dunno how to continue like this.
i hope she get wad i mean.
love is really something that cannot be force.
if she really dun like.
dun be forced to say yes.
cuz you can still continue to say no.
and if you r being forcefully to say yes.
together will be happy?
i really dun think so...
people kept asking you cuz they want to know if you really have feelings for them already?
and ask you cuz they feel you start to have feeling?
seriously there is no such a thing call friendship love.
really dun have, if it exist in a bgr, there will never be happiness either for each of the party.
if there is friendship love.
then it is only to friends.
guys doesnt want anything more than the feelings you give.
its just simple.
we want to hear you saying i love you.
we want you to understand.
bringing people out in a date so frequently is really an insult.
love is about giving in.
really giving in.
if you dun have feeling.
just say stop le.
or you can pei yang the feeling.
i really dunno how to say.
but i really want let you know.
if that day i really am okie with ur conditions, i believe i will end up to be like you with your ex.
i really love you alot thats why im saying that.
i do not want to hurt ourselves, neither do i want to hurt you.
just do not say okie when you think its 'forced'.
u have ur women rights wad.
u can say they are harassing you wad.
so why worry?
its all whether you want or not.
i just hope you understand.
no one wants this ending.
ahh!! very luan!!!!!!! HELP!!! =(
i just hope you can be the type of girlfriend i want..
who both of us really love each other.
really thats wad love is about.
love is not calling friends out when dating.
love is not just spending time with each other, but also the attention given to each other.
love is giving in.
all those movies stuff.
if i am him, i understood you dun like to watch and i simply just wont call u.
and instead ill just go to my other friends to watch with.
its really small matter.
i really dunno how to say.
but i really love you.
i dunwan to hurt myself.
i want you to be happy.
wad is the best thing to do?
divert myself from getting ur attention.
thats wad all will do.
i really dunno...
why must all these stuff comes together.
i really hope i can go back to the past.
where you always call me and we spend the night together.
i really hope i can be like normal.
give you all my love for you.
i hope we can really understand each other well.
but i dun understand.
why isnt there a strong trust between each of us?
i seriously never lie to you much.
only white lies of calling you to sleep.
haiz.
its really too dissapointing.
i will really not bother you much.
i really dunwan this.
and i really hope you are as understanding as before.
the day we know each other.
i really have enough of this.
and i promise you i will really not disturb you or 'force' you into love.
ill just be there when you are ready.
really...
no more asking you to do stuff you dun like.
haiz....
i really dunno how. seriously.
i love her so much and i dunno how to continue.
she asked me why am i so troubled.
i really dunno how to tell her.
i start to get embarassed to tell her i love her.
i start to have no more courage after that event.
my life looks dull all again like wad happened a few years ago.
i want to tell her i love her, i felt troubled cuz i dunno how to make her happy.
i dunno how to love her. i dunno how to get wad she wants.
how??
many is calling me to give her up.
and i tried.
i really tried to.
but everytime i am doing that.
i really miss her.
its really very upset.
and the idiotic problems come at the same time.
ahhhh!!!! really stressed!!
awhile she treats me coldly.
awhile she treats me so nice.
why is that so?
i really dunno man.
is that a friendship to her? or is that love?
i will try to keep myself happy.
for as long you are happy.
i will respect you in everything you do.
good luck in your life. i love you
